You're a Definition of Whatever

I am extremely pissed off.
Grrr. I can't believe I was fooled.
You are so effin' irritating! Grrrrrr

Time for Drastic Measures

Alright, I miss you. There.. I said it! I miss playing my violin. Even if I'm no good, I still miss you..


I watched a real good violin and piano cover of Mr. Brightside on Youtube and regrets sank in. If I would've practiced everyday for the last 2 years, I would've been extremely good in playing the violin. Oh well. There's still hope. I promise to practice everyday and to take lessons starting next week. I'll be updating you guys of my progress via this blog, twitter or facebook (whichever goes first).


I have to go home and get my violin. Ta-ta. 


Oh, by the way, here's the link for the Mr. Brightside piano and violin cover CLICK ME PLEASE YOU SWEET LITTLE CREATURE OF THE LORD


This is a snapshot of my pretty little babe, my violin. Along with my other babe, Marlboro Lights. 

Blog Renovation and 2011 Fashion Trends

This blog needs a bit of tweaking. I don;t usually go for designs that last forever. I need to reinvent this blog sooner or later. Please give the energy and the will to do so.

Been very busy with work and nonsense. The most I can do is to update this blog at least twice a month. Summer is here in the Philippines! I can already feel the tides splashing in. I badly need a vacation --- away from everyone! hahaha.. annnddddd,,,, I NEED TO SHOP! I already looked for trends and fashion in and outs for this season. uhmmm.. Let's see:

SHOES

KITTEN HEELS are back! They're like my favorite since FOREVER! I don't think they would ever go outdated specially for those who sport casual wear. They are my new love! Will be shopping for lots and lots this style when my paycheck arrives. I am so excited. They're not catwalk material, but comfy and nice is good for everyday wear. But never ever wear the same kind of shoes everyday. It's fashion suicide. At least make it a point to alternately wear 3 pairs of shoes. This will also keep those shoes look new.

CLOGS. One word -- EEWW. I am not a fan of clogs. They look disgusting. They make your feet look big. The shoes look cheap even if they cost more than a hundred grand. You won't see me wearing them or near them this season.






WARDROBE

70s is the era of beauty. It's the fashion age. Guess what? It's still the fashion fad for this season! I don't know how to literally talk about wardrobe because whenever I shop, I just pick something fantastic and I go over the other stuff I have at home in my mind. Then, I patch it all up in my head, if the style is great and doable or if I can pull it off, I buy it. There you go. This decade is the time of hippies so think bohemian. Incorporate scarves, bandannas and a lot of accessories. Go for loose dresses, long tops and lots of accessories.

HAIRSTYLE
Apparently, long and wavy is still in. Go for the effortless, "just got out from bed" look. It makes you look effortless and fresh. Bangs is still in. Pixie cuts and bobs are also in. For those who sport long hair, braid and tie them in a knot or let your hair loose.

I forgot to mention about my latest wardrobe obsession, SKINNY SLACKS! It's my first job that requires me to go to work in business, smart casual attire. Slacks isn't really my thing. They make my legs look super small. I thought it would be a fashion disaster. But lo and behold, I found my savior! SKINNY SLACKS! It works well with ballet flats, heels and just plain sandals! Sorry about this pic. I could't find the one that I fell in love with. This will do.





I am so excited to go out and shop! Till next week!

Did You Guys Miss Me?

Well, did you? Did you?
Crazy times. God, I never thought I'd write in this blog again. I missed you guys, from the very bottom of my lonely but happy heart. Here's a treat for you guys, I was in the training room last night (Oh, I have a new job by th way as a "trusted adviser"/ customer care rep. *Clap clap!*) and had a lot of free time. I read a story about Marilyn Manson's plans to do his interpretation of Lewis Carroll (The eccentric mind behind Alice and Wonderland).

Before I start and share this disturbing yet artistic video, I would like to share to you a few personal info. First and foremost, I am a Marilyn Manson fan. I love his individuality and over-the-top theatrics. Over time, this liking for drifted far far away due to reasons that are many to think of. One is because I am getting a bit old and sick of his theatrics and second, because he tends to overdo things (meaning it eventually lacks class and taste). Forgive my grammar or basically the entire way of writing. I have been a scatterbrain lately and you all have to understand that I just got home from a graveyard shift and I am really really as in totally sleeeeeeppppyyy. Anyway, back to the topic, as you see. I became interested once more in Marilyn Manson. It is true that this movie is a bit disturbing but on the bright side, you will definitely see Manson's artistry. He is truly a hell of an artist.

Be warned: This video is not for the faint of heart or even for the conservatives.

Enough of the "blah blahs"... Here's the video guys, HOPE YA ALL LIKE IT.

Oh, I forgot to mention, this movie was cancelled in production due to explicit content. WATCH WITH YOUR OWN RISK.

--Loving You Guys Eternally, Five Times Over,
LAI

*Let's watch the preview first:
Phantasmagoria: The Visions of Lewis Carroll PREVIEW
(embedding was disabled, zarreeeyyy. :(
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VeixzZTt92o

Phantasmagoria: The Visions of Lewis Carroll Trailer

Letter to Montague

My Montague,

Let's just say that I always see the good in people -- that tiny speck of goodness left in their hearts.

A lot of people think I'm crazy. A lot of people perceive me as a little girl, trying to save those who are not worth saving, but I didn't care. But what did you repay me? A little kindness but a ton of shit.

You are the reason why I lost all hope in mankind. You are the living proof that there really is no room for change. In Tagalog , "Ganyan ka na lang". No matter how hard I help you, if you are not willing to do this for yourself, you will be forever stuck in that bunch of crap you have created. I've had enough of your inconsistencies. You are the exception, I cannot fight for you anymore.

Sometimes, quiting, surrendering, losing faith in someone may not be the best decision but it is the right thing to do.

You're on your own. I wish you the best.

Capulet

Sylvia Plath's - Poppies in October

This is perhaps one of the most beautiful Plath poems I've ever read. You can easily connect to her writing. Oh how I love Sylvia Plath.

Even the sun-clouds this morning cannot manage such skirts.

Nor the woman in the ambulance

Whose red heart blooms through her coat so astoundingly ----A gift, a love gift

Utterly unasked for

By a skyPalely and flamily

Igniting its carbon monoxides, by eyes

Dulled to a halt under bowlers.O my God, what am I

That these late mouths should cry open

In a forest of frost, in a dawn of cornflowers.

Excuse me, Montague.. It's Plath's reign once again.

Nadezhda, Nadezda... Krupskaya, Melencio...

There is no such thing as duty. If you know that a thing is right, you want to do it. If you don't want to do it—it isn't right. If it's right and you don't want to do it—you don't know what right is and you're not a man.

Chapter 6 of Ayn Rand's We The Living

I just remembered my Philosophy of Man class.

My professor once asked me, "What is the difference between man and being?"

I forgot what I answered. At that time though, it was the right one but if you ask me now, I don't know if I'll answer based on knowledge alone or from experience. Bah! What am I talking about?

Let's get back to the topic, so... Ayn Rand is right. If you know it's right, then do it! If you know it's wrong, why would you do it anyway? On the other hand, if it is right and you still don't want to do it, you have a problem buddy!

Ayn Rand

Boris Pasternak

Leo Tolstoy, etc etc. 
I love Russian novelists! <3

Of course, there are other Russian personalities that I also admire such as 

Vladimir Lenin

 and wife Nadezhda Kruskaya. (Yes, my name Lara Nadezda is derived from Nadezhda herself)

Wow, I am deeply inclined with Russian literature and Russian history. No wonder I want to take up European Studies next year. :)

My greatest dream? To win either a Nobel Peace Prize or a Pulitzer Prize. Any will do but I'd be as happy as hell if I get both. Wait, can a non-American win a Pulitzer?

I have seen "BITTER" days... and Nights!

Reps to all the people I saw last night at Cubao X! The crowd never ceases to amaze me.. There's always something in Cubao X that will surprise you. Well, then again, it just might be the people, the conversation, the events or the alcohol.

Last night was a different story. Since, this blog was really made for unrequited love and star-crossed lovers, there ought to be just a tiny inch of negativity. Okay, so it was a bitter night -- far much bitter than the rest. I am trying to write this amidst the hangover so please forgive the scattered thoughts. Anyway, I am depressed --- BIGTIME and I don't know why. This actually sucks the life out of me. Is this maturity calling? Is it my heart bleeding? Bah! I don't really know.

Despite the fact that I am kind of "over the edge" right now, I am not bitter. At least that's the one thing I know I am not. See, my friends and I had a long chat about bitterness, about their exes and stuff. The result --- it feeds on my depression.

For all those BITTER sour-grapes out there, you have to.....