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Coping with Grief and Recovery Process from Lai on Vimeo.

TYPO and MENTAL error: CRITIQUE=CRITIC

It's our 2nd anniversary BABE! Tinuloy ko pa rin to kasi ito yung inaabangan kasi talaga natin. We were supposed to go out of town and leave everything behind. We were supposed to have a week-long celebration.

This time, it's a celebration of tastes, memories, life and love. Ito yung mga pagkain na memorable sa kin, sa tin - mga hilig nating ibigay sa isa't isa. Kahit you're not physically here to celebrate this day, at least I got to celebrate it with the people we love -friends and family.

Salamat sa lahat lahat BABE. Salamat sa pag aalaga sa akin, lalong lalo na pag may sakit ako. Salamat sa laging pagremind sa akin na mahal na mahal mo ko. Salamat sa mga ngiti at tawa mo na laging nagpapagaan ng loob ko. Salamat sa paghatid sa kin araw-araw papuntang school at sa pag attend ng activities ko sa school.Thank you for being there for me sa lahat ng oras, mapa-worst or best moments of my life. Thank you for always telling me I am beautiful whenever I needed a confidence boost. Thank you for believing in me and being my number1 fan in everything. Thank you for sharing all your hopes, dreams and worst fears to me. Thank you for being the ideal partner - my perfect boyfriend. Thank you for the unconditional love babe na hanggang sa huli ay pinakita at ipinadama mo sa kin. Thank you for the wonderful memories. Hinding hindi na yun maaalis sa isip, puso at kaluluwa ko. I will always look back at those memories dahil yun ang pinakamasaya ko. Being with you was as natural as breathing.

Kulang ang space dito kung ieenumerate ko lahat ng namimiss ko. Yung malaki mong tyan na favorite kong gawing unan, yung paghilik mo ng malakas na minsan parang nananakot, yung nagsasalita ka habang tulog, yung ichura mo pag nagtatampo, yung reaksyon ng mukha mo pag hindi ako nakapag "I love you too" agad, yung mga yakap mo pag sobrang down na down ako, encouraging words mo pag naaasar ako sa buhay, pagtulong mo sa mga video and powerpoint presentations ko, yung pagsugod mo sa bahay at iniiwan lahat ng ginagawa mo pag naaaksidente ako, yung maya't mayang text mo habang nagkaklase ako, yung paghele mo sakin para makatulog, yung pag sinabi mong "hindi pwede" at alam ko talagang hindi talaga pwede, yung pagkanta mo nung song natin at random moments and so much more.

Parang naputulan ako ng mga paa nung nawala ka. Lahat ng plano at pangarap na tayong dalawa ang nagbuo bigla bigla na lang nawala. Kung gaano kabilis kang ibinigay sa kin, ganun din kabilis kinuha. Oo nahihirapan pa rin ako. Masakit pa rin isipin na hindi na kita makikita ulit, na hindi na tayo tatandang magkasama. Hindi naman madaling maiwanan. Hindi naman madaling mag move on lalo na kung alam naman natin na hindi mo rin ako ginustong iwan.

Gaya nga ng pinost ko noon sa fb, "you are my inspiration in everything I was, I am and will be." you will always have a special place in my heart BABE. Hinding hindi kita malilimutan. You taught me a lot things. You made me a better person. You became my light when everything seemed to be so dark. You were my rock. Itong mga bagay na to alam kong once in a lifetime ko lang mararanasan and I'm so grateful that I got to share these with you.

Hindi ko niroromanticize ang love story natin. Ikaw na ikaw talaga yan BABE. Mahirap man paniwalaan na may taong ganito, eh ganito ka eh - ikaw 'to. Hindi man ako showy at affectionate na girlfriend, sana naramdaman mo kung gaano kita kamahal in my own little ways. Sana naramdaman mo how grateful I was to have had you in my life. I was the luckiest person to experience such true love that will last a lifetime. Na kahit sa sandaling panahon lang, we were happy.

Click Here for More Photos

Did You Guys Miss Me?

Well, did you? Did you?
Crazy times. God, I never thought I'd write in this blog again. I missed you guys, from the very bottom of my lonely but happy heart. Here's a treat for you guys, I was in the training room last night (Oh, I have a new job by th way as a "trusted adviser"/ customer care rep. *Clap clap!*) and had a lot of free time. I read a story about Marilyn Manson's plans to do his interpretation of Lewis Carroll (The eccentric mind behind Alice and Wonderland).

Before I start and share this disturbing yet artistic video, I would like to share to you a few personal info. First and foremost, I am a Marilyn Manson fan. I love his individuality and over-the-top theatrics. Over time, this liking for drifted far far away due to reasons that are many to think of. One is because I am getting a bit old and sick of his theatrics and second, because he tends to overdo things (meaning it eventually lacks class and taste). Forgive my grammar or basically the entire way of writing. I have been a scatterbrain lately and you all have to understand that I just got home from a graveyard shift and I am really really as in totally sleeeeeeppppyyy. Anyway, back to the topic, as you see. I became interested once more in Marilyn Manson. It is true that this movie is a bit disturbing but on the bright side, you will definitely see Manson's artistry. He is truly a hell of an artist.

Be warned: This video is not for the faint of heart or even for the conservatives.

Enough of the "blah blahs"... Here's the video guys, HOPE YA ALL LIKE IT.

Oh, I forgot to mention, this movie was cancelled in production due to explicit content. WATCH WITH YOUR OWN RISK.

--Loving You Guys Eternally, Five Times Over,
LAI

*Let's watch the preview first:
Phantasmagoria: The Visions of Lewis Carroll PREVIEW
(embedding was disabled, zarreeeyyy. :(
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VeixzZTt92o

Phantasmagoria: The Visions of Lewis Carroll Trailer

INK

so so proud of my new ink..
Photo c/o my colleague and expert Sony Alpha Cam photographer - Ronee!!!

This was taken during our team outing in Tagaytay..

Love the effect here.. I was wearing a racer-back undergarment which is why you can clearly see the X mark and of course it was so hot there you can already see my pores. Haha! This is what you get with a 20++ megapixel camera..

I got a addicted to tattoos.. Will add another one soon.. :))

LOMO LOVE

These aren't my pictures.

Just got them off the Internet...

I haven't bought a lomo cam yet but I just thought I'd share these to you guys...

I'm buying a lomo cam next payday! That's a promise! :))

At Long Last...

Hi guys! It's so nice to be back on track.. Been busy with work.. I hope you understand... Ugh I'm soo stressed out! With almost 2 months of going sabbatical, I only attended 1 party/exhibit.. It was nice. It was wild and it was the happiest party I've ever attended. LOL.


Below is an art work by famous fashion artists at Cubao Expo.

I call it ART!!

Oh and by the way, I don't have any unrequited love/star crossed lovers story right now. I mean, I don't even have a boyfriend! Yes, I broke up with my boyfriend 2 months ago. It was a long story due to the complicatedness of life (complicatedness?? Is that a word?). So, I am single, happy and proud!


So, I wasn't able to go out last night. I was supposed to drink and party but I woke up at around 1am and I was too lazy to get up and get dressed. Of course I love my new job even if it sometimes gets a bit irritating and tiring. I also love writing. My passion for writing never ceased. Moreover, I still love drinking but with my hectic schedule, drinking and partying may sometimes be impossible. So here I am, writing about stuff I miss. Oh man, I really miss my old life. On the bright side, at least my liver is far from danger and my pocket is still full of cash! Ahahaha!


In terms of music, I forgot to write about Club 8's concert. As usual, because of my work which keeps me away from the social scene, I was not informed about their concert. I just saw the poster at Club Dredd in Eastwood while I was having breakfast. I miss club 8's music.. I miss indie pop!!!


Club 8

My favorite Club 8 songs -- Heaven and Whatever You Want




Here is a video of HEAVEN





:))

HAPPY

This blog needs positivity...
So there. Happy.
A happy couple..

Little Miss Series...

Got this photo from here.... CLICK ME



I am so gonna buy this shirt.
I LOVE IT!!!!
For more LITTLE MISS shirt designs, just click on the link above... OK? Ta-ta!

Feed my Empty Brain with BOOOOOKKKSSS...

I LOVE YOU PAULO COELHO!


Haven't seen the movie yet and I'd rather read the book first to experience the excitement, drama and imagination first-hand.


This book tells us the story of Veronika, a 24-year-old perfect girl who has everything in life but decides to kill herself. It is a story of inspiration that amidst all the darkness in life, we tend to see it in a lighter shade.


Veronika Decides to Die has been said to be based from the author's experiences in numerous mental institutions. It is focused on the concept of "madness".

Collective madness is called insanity.

I'm in love with a Montague

Holding back feelings for someone won't make it any better... 

So, obsessing and letting your love suffice is a good option. 

Love, until there's no more left to love...

-Lara Nadezda P. Melencio

I kept thinking about these words while I was in my "Happy Place"... It's the truth, right? I once kept my feelings for someone hoping I can move on but nearly 3 years had passed, and everytime I hear his voice, see his face and kiss his lips, I still get butterflies on my stomach. He is like a drug -- bad for my system but feels so right.. I am now trying with all my might to just admire and love him from afar. I still can't understand why 2 perfect people can never be together. Sucks to be US.. I know, right?? 

I'm in love with a Montague!!

Love, Juliet Capulet

 Don't get me wrong, I love the chase -- but sometimes, I would rather wish it's over rather than running in circles wondering when will one of us will catch the other...


Star-Crossed Lovers like Romeo and Juliet

Party Madness

I was so exhausted from 2 weeks of straight partying. I don't want another sip of vodka or beer or any form of alcohol and nicotine for like a decade. As in seriously!! Forgive my raging social hormones... I wasn't able to update this site for more than 2 weeks (I know and I'm really sorry). It was just a bad couple of weeks... I'm reinventing my finances (Ha! As if there's something to reinvent) and of course I'm reinventing myself (fashion wise) although "reinventing" is not a very applicable term with what I'm doing...


I am getting back with the old "rock and roll scene"... Not the music though, I still love INDIE POP, it's just because of the crowd. I have come to a conclusion that all Metal Heads (especially guys) think highly of themselves. I am an art person and I thought music geniuses from local underground metal bands would share my passion. So, based on my own experience, Metal Heads hate poetry reading and indie films... and of course (forgive my dissing but I have to blurt out the truth), they suck... BIG TIME!!!!

Speaking of art and geniuses, here's a poster of the latest "IT" event this Friday. Yes, I'm going!
A former classmate sent invites on Facebook...


The invitation info:

UP Pi Omicron Fraternity’s 

INDIEMAND

Indiemand is an annual, open-field, walk-in, and independent film showing that showcases an array of artistic productions ranging from narrative, documentary, experimental and animated short films to full-length films produced by diverse yet creative and independent film makers from different institutions. It aims to provide film artists an opportunity to showcase their talents and to share their “slices of life” through the medium of film to a critical public audience. 

Indiemand 6 showcases an array of artistic productions that ranges from narrative, documentary, experimental and animated short films to full-length films produced by diverse yet creative aspiring and professional film makers from different disciplines, institutions and social classes. The event, in its 6th year, will be staged at the U.P. Lagoon area across the Faculty Center in the University of the Philippines, Diliman, Quezon City on December 18, 2009, in time with the annual colorful festivity in the university, the historical Lantern Parade of U.P. Diliman Students, faculty members from different colleges and schools, artists from different disciplines and film enthusiasts alike composed the audience of the past five Indiemands since it begun in 2004.

See you guys! Will post pictures and details of the parties next time! :)) 

My Weakness

I'm a sucker for people who love Van Gogh.
Don't you just love people who appreciate art?
Art doesn't need to be beautiful but it certainly needs to have emotions/feelings...

On the left is Vincent Willem van Gogh's painting entitled "Starry Starry Night". It it is the same one that  inspired Don McLean to write a song about this exceptional artist. 


Sure, this painting has lots of colors but can you see the sadness it emanates? This is one of my favorite Van Gogh paintings.

This is entitled "Sunflowers". This is my favorite Van Gogh artwork for it represents reality --- life. Notice the state of the sunflowers? Some of them are fresh, happy-looking and sunny while the others are either about to wither or are already dead.
I don't need to elaborate. You get the point, right?


As the song "Vincent" says, 

Have I told you, Vincent

this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you.

 If you love Van Gogh ----
then ---


ILOVEYOU :)

Is This What You Call Art?! Seriously?!

Medium - Craypass, Black..
Just having fun with Dandan's art materials...
doodle wannabe...


(Click on the Photos for a Better View)

The Beatles-inspired cheesy one-liners! LOL..


"The Sun Won't Be The Same Without You"
"Haven't Seen a Rainbow Since You Left"
"After The Rain, The Sun Ain't Complete Without You As Its Rainbow"

LOVE KILLS
(i know)

Lomo-inspired Photography...

DJs are HOT but you're way HOTTER

It's art day... 


and I made this for you... :)))

Who Says Fashion's Only for the Rich and Famous??!?

I don't really have a particular fashion style. I just go with what I want to wear at the moment. Sometimes, I opt for the weirdest pieces but more often than not, I go for the simpler look. I love to play with colors when dressing up but don't be fooled! I can pull up a really hot Gothic attire if I wanted to. I have learned that shoes is the main factor in making an outfit click. Sure, it also has to go with accessories but the right shoes will always give you a confidence boost.


This is me getting ready for Cubao Expo's Halloween Party @ Future (which was postponed btw due to super typhoon Santi) I got to finally flaunt this attire a week after @ Cubao X and Taft...


Thai Top c/o my Brother&Sis-in-Law (from Bangkok)
Shorts c/o my beloved friend, Tina (This was a Xmas gift)
Pumps c/o myself (ukay, ukay along P.Tuazon) and Earrings c/o Sweet Accessories

This is a simple version of me. I just love my yellow top. I bought it at a random Ukay shop in Anonas. Project 3 has the best Ukay shops in metro manila. Of course, Baguio is still the best. 
I know the picture's a bit blurry but the main items here are the accessories.. I flaunted this outfit at a bar along Taft in Manila.


Purple Headband - Trinoma
Black Capiz Earrings - Cubao Flea Market
Purple beaded necklace - bought it at a shell, wood and bead shop in Cubao
Silver Hippie-ish Ring - c/o Sweet Accessories
Yellow top - Ukay ukay
Shorts - Sta. Lucia
Purple Dupe Slippers - (not on picture) SM Cubao
Thai Bag - (not on picture) Bangkok Floating Market

This is a trying-hard-to-be-bubbly look. I found my yellow flats (which I had bought over a year ago) hidden in my huge cabinet with boxes and boxes of shoes. I wanted a fresh and teen-looking outfit.


Headband - none
Earrings - none
Bag - none
Yellow Top c/o SM Cubao Teens Department
Purple Top @ my favorite Ukay store in Anonas
Green Checkered Shorts - Sta. Lucia
Yellow Flats - Isetan Cubao ( I got it on sale!1!)


I got to flaunt this teeny-bopper style at my mom's office in Caloocan.

This was taken after making my hair and make-up. The last picture before I put on my bridesmaid gown. I just wore this outfit going to the hotel. This was my brother's wedding day.


Earrings - SM Cubao accessories
Black Dress  - Pasig Flea Market
Gray Belt - SM Cubao
White-Strapped Sandals - (not on picture) a store in SM North Edsa
Flesh-colored Bag with Gray Straps - (not on pictures) SM Cubao

I call this my "Sun Dress". No, it's not a shortcut for Sunday Dress. It's a literal Sun dress cause this was time when I loved the sun so much. 


Retro Sunglasses - I just found my mom's old sunglasses. Now it's mine! haha!
Checkered Tube Dress - a gift from my lola (grandmother), Toronto
Beaded Anklet - Bought this at Laiya, Batangas. Me and my then-boyfriend have matching anklets.
Gold Dupe Slippers (not on picture) - SM Cubao
Brownish Hair Clip - I have no idea where I got it
Earrings - none

Taken at 77 Cafe in Q.C.
I'm drinking Infinit


Flesh Colored Top - a boutique in Metrowalk
Silver Bangles - gift from my stepmom, bought in Vietnam
Silver Dangling Earrings - 20-peso Store, Cubao
Checkered Shorts (not on picture) - Pasig Flea Market


I was also wearing my Gold Dupe Slippers.. :)))

My stepmom's old Reading Glasses
My Favorite Red Earrings
Green Spandex Top - greenhills
Skinny Jeans
Beaded Bracelets - bought at a vendor in Anonas
Purple Dupe Slippers


Office Fashion

At a vacation in Laiya, Batangas


My mom's old sunglasses
Earrings c/o my lola, Las Vegas
Necklace - bought at some Batangeno vendors in the area
Brown Top - Pasig Flea Market


I forgot what shorts/ pants/ leggings i wore...

Meet Dan Dan, my niece...
Such a cutie...


Great taste in fashion...


Well, that concludes my fashion list.
Will upload new pictures when I have the time.. :))

Indie Pop

Never stop... Indie Pop

Love knows no reason...It chooses every person it wants... You don't have to think about it. Just follow your heart.. Love is the answer... Love is the reason... Love is everything...